From buddy Fri Jun 16 18:24:45 1995
Date: Tue, 19 Oct 1993 14:03:20
Subject: Golf Joke


   It was a beautiful sunny day at the golf course. The gentleman took aim on
the ball and drove his first shot deep into a wooded area. He sighed and
proceeded to the area where the ball had gone into the woods.
   As he was looking around for his ball, he heard a voice calling to him. He
whirled around and there stood a very ugly witch. She had his golf ball and
explained to him that it had hit her in the head. She was not very pleased
about this, but went on to explain that she had little contact with the
outside world and when she did have an encounter, she condidered it a special
occasion.
   The witch said that she had magical powers and would grant the man one
wish. However, when the wish was granted, the man would notice a tremendous
decrease in his sexual desire and ability to perform. The man thought about
this for a few minutes and then stated that he would agree to those
conditions.
   The witch asked what his wish was and the man simply stated, "I want my
golf game to improve." The witch rocked back on her heels and stared at the
man. After a few minutes she said, "Is that all?". He said," Yes, that's it".
The witch said," Are you telling me that is all you want, when you could have
anything in this world?" The man looked her in straight in the eyes and
said,"Yes".
    Two years later, on another beautiful day, the man is at the same golf
course and drives a tee shot into the woods. The man starts shaking because
he had not hooked or sliced a shot since the day he had encountered the
witch. He went into the woods and there stood the witch. She looked at him
and said, "I made your shot go bad because I wanted to talk to you."  The man
was visibly relieved when he heard this and asked what she wanted. The witch
wanted to know if he had any regrets about his wish. The man said, "Well,
things couldn't be better with my golf game. I've won every major tournament
on the amateur circuit and I'll soon be on the PGA tour. As far as my sex
life, I have only had six encounters in 2 years. "Hasn't that bothered you?,"
asked the witch. The man said, "No, I'm allright". The witch said," Well, I'm
glad it all worked out, although there is nothing you or I can do about it
now - the spell that was cast can never be changed".
    With that, they parted company. On his way out to the fairway, the man
said to himself, "The PGA Tour and sex three times a year - not bad for a
small parish priest".