From buddy  Mon Nov  6 09:39:14 1995
Date: Mon, 6 Nov 1995 09:39:08
Subject: O.J. again


LANCE ITO'S SIDEBAR & GRILL
(if you have an hour to kill, please join us for dinner)

*APPETIZERS*

ROSA LOPEZ NACHOS
Spicy, with Mexican accent.  Nachos haven't been this good since...well, we
can't remember.

*SOUP*

SOUP DUJURY
Aged for over a year.  May be bitter.

*SALADS*

KATO SALAD
An empty head of lettuce, with very little dressing.

*FROM THE BAR*

RON GOLDMAN WINE
Young vintage, good body.  But you have to bring your own glasses.

PAULA BARBERI COCKTAIL
O.J. with a little honey on the side.  Goes down real easy.

MARCIA CLARK BEER
We thought we thought we had a case, but now we're not sure.

*SANDWICHES*

SIMPSON ALIBI SANDWICH
Full of balony, and hard to swallow, but lots of stupid people are buying it.

*FROM THE GRILL*

MARK FUHRMAN CHICKEN PLATTER
Absolutely no dark meat.

VEAL A'LA NICOLE
Well battered and sliced.  Served without the head.

DENNIS FUNG PLATE
Grilled detective, served open face.  May be contaminated.

*DESSERT*

Sorry, our bakery is temporarily closed.  The lawyers have taken all the
dough.