From buddy Mon Nov  7 19:53:56 1994
Date: Wed, 26 Jan 1994 10:07:12
Subject: Misc Quotes (clean,non-offensive)


1. Pressure is playing for $50 a hole with only $5 in your pocket.
--- Lee Trevino

2. A halo has to fall only a few inches to become a noose.
--- Farmers Almanac

3. If you think OSHA is a small town in Wisconsin, you're in trouble.

4. A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the pants.
--- Wilcox's Law

5. All kookies are not in a jar.

6. I never give them hell.  I just tell the truth and they think it's hell.
--- Harry Truman

7. Legend --- a lie that has attained the dignity of age.
--- H. L. Mencken

8. Insanity is hereditary.  You get it from your children.

9. Experience varies directly with equipment ruined.
--- Horner's Five-Thump Postulate

10. Wet manure is slippery.
--- OSHA discovery


Excerpted from  Quotes, Damned Quotes and ... by John Bibby

Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them they
translate into their own language and forthwith it is something
entirely different. (Goethe)

If there is a 50-50 chance that something can go wrong, then 9
times out of ten it will. (Paul Harvey News, 1979)

``Give us a copper Guv'' said the beggar to the Treasury
statistician, when he waylaid him in Parliament square. ``I
haven't eaten for three days.'' ``Ah,'' said the statistician, ``and
how does that compare with the same period last year?'' (Russell Lewis)

``I gather, young man, that you wish to be a Member of
Parliament. The first lesson that you must learn is, when I call
for statistics about the rate of infant mortality, what I want
is proof that fewer babies died when I was Prime Minister than
when anyone else was Prime Minister. That is a political
statistic.'' (Winston Churchill)