From buddy Mon Nov  7 19:31:29 1994
Date: Thu, 23 Jun 1994 08:20:30
Subject: Life's Little Truths (Pt 1 of 17)


 *  Trust everybody ... then cut the cards.

 *  Two wrongs are only the beginning.

 *  If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

 *  To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles.

 *  Exceptions prove the rule ... and wreck the budget.

 *  Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.

 *  Quality assurance dosen't.

 *  The tough part of a Data Processing Manager's job is that users don't really
    know what they want, but they know for certain what they don't want.

 *  Exceptions always outnumber rules.

 *  To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research

 *  No one is listening until you make a mistake.

 *  He who hesitates is probably right.

 *  The ideal resume will turn up one day after the position is filled.

 *  If somthing is confidential, it will be left in the copier machine.

 *  One child is not enough, but two children are far too many.

 *  A clean tie attracts the soup of the day.

 *  The hardness of the butter is in direct proportion to the softness of the
    bread.

 *  The bag that breaks is the one with the eggs.

 *  When there are sufficient funds in the checking account, checks take two
    weeks to clear.  When there are insufficient funds, checks clear overnight.

 *  The book you spent $20.95 for today will come out in paperback tomorrow.

 *  The more an item costs, the farther you have to send it for repairs.

 *  You never want the one you can afford.

 *  Never ask the barber if you need a haircut or a salesman if his is a good
    price.

 *  If it says "one size fits all," it dosen't fit anyone.